Confidence, esteem & beliefs
Believing in yourself
Do you recognise one or some of these …
- Failure & fear of failure (and success)
- Lack of success, nerves and stress
- Do you hear some sort of critical internal dialogue?
- See yourself always failing?
- History repeating itself over and over negatively
- Is what you experience a level of perfection so you’re never good enough?
- Never be good enough
- Self sabotaging behaviour
- Ball and chain effect – barriers to success (beliefs and events)
- Scared and nervous of the future (in case it turns out bad)
- Not recognising the positive
- Always seeing and perceiving the negatives
These can all be part of your core belief system … not good enough, will never be good enough etc.
- Maybe you’ve been given these beliefs in early years?
- Maybe it was a part of bullying?
- Have you lost confidence through circumstances?
Although you’ve been handed and developed this negativity, it doesn’t mean that you’ll always have to go along with this into the future.
Here are some suggestions:
- Put the past in the past,
- Discard what’s rubbish and incorrect
- Work on building your self esteem and confidence.
- Realise, develop and then use the positives you’d like in your life.
- Empower yourself
- Turn off your inner critic
- Find and work on turning self sabotaging behaviours into better ones
Whatever is in the past can still affect people negatively well into the future. By removing the rubbish and replacing this with positive beliefs and confidence you can grow and develop stronger and more confident – no matter what you’ve been told or experienced. It’s a bit like sorting out the weeds from the beautiful flowers – those weeds that would happily take up all the energy from the flowers unless dealt with. Those ball and chains around you can be released and their power over you can be dissolved, replaced by inner confidence and esteem.
I’ve worked with numerous clients on this area, where they were able to work on areas that hurt them (whatever age or maturity).
Building your self esteem
OK, this is really all about putting you back in control and having better management of the present, the past and ultimately the future. So, how would you like to be …
- Feel & be more confident
- Be more self assured
- Feel and be more calm
- Feel & be more relaxed
- Feel & be more secure
- Feel & be more in control
- Be less reactive
For some it means looking at their past.
- You can discover who you really are, deal with the past and move on more positively.
- Would you like to get to know who you truly are (rather than what you’ve been told)?
- Really realise what you’re good at!
- Get rid of the rubbish you’ve been given
What would be helpful to you?
- Have better management of your reactions to certain situations?
- Put your past in the past (where it belongs)
- Work on what’s upset/affected you before, for a better future?
- Put those who gave you those labels/names in their proper place.
- Get rid of their stuff that’s been affecting you all these years!
- As children it’s difficult to sort out what’s good to keep and what’s rubbish, especially if it comes from adults.
- Want to get rid of what you’ve been given?
- Really realise what you’re good at!
… or anything else that you’d like to work on! It may have been some form of unreasonable behaviour, unfairness or sheer inability to deal in a mature way with the situation they found themselves in, possibly using blame and guilt.
- Maybe you remind them of someone else and they can’t get rid of that connection (that’s not your fault).
- Maybe someone else reminds them of someone else and that promotes favouritsm of another and they treat you unfairly.
People and especially children can become the brunt of behaviours that come from past events/beliefs – as an innocent bystander.
However, this doesn’t mean that you have to keep suffering from those effects!
- You may just need some support and help in getting rid of some old rubbish (from other people).
- Develop more confidence & trust in yourself.
It could need you to be brave, looking at the past that may have hurt or affected you, however, you can now take back control – and we will always work together on what you want to work on. We go at your pace, we look at things you need to look at (at your discretion) and we do this in a safe and confidential environment.